Andymatic

Month: November 2007

  • Platform Agnostic

    I’m really starting to miss Ron. He’s been in Milwaukee for several weeks now. I did visit last week. But I miss seeing him and seeing his big shiny smile. Plus, he’s very toasty warm in the winter. It seems most couples have a cold-sleeper and a hot-sleeper. I’m always cold when I sleep and […]

  • At Last, My Arm is Complete Again

    Praise the Gods of DHL for delivering my repaired Sony Vaio PCG-SRX87 back safely from the Pacific Northwern laptop repair center of LaptopService.com. The LCD hinge is no longer floppy or flaccid but stiff and strong and long-lasting. Extra points for knowing that this post’s title refers to the climax of the song ‘My Friend’ […]

  • Criss Angels Kicks Paranormalist John Callahan's Ass on Live TV

    Paranormalist? And why doesn’t the female assistant wearing a bra? Yeah. Metal. Rectangular. Four Wheels. Shame he didn’t divine the lead paint. Update: Is that Raven Simone? [youtube]pE45QHIUfiM[/youtube]

  • Are All Republicans Really Gay?

    Another week, another Republican asshole caught in flagrante delicto with a man, baby. This time WA State Rep Richard Curtis who assures he’s not gay when he caught paying $1K for bareback buttsex with a male prostitute dressed in woman’s lingerie. Curtis is married with children — and votes conservatively. He has voted against a […]

  • Thought Crime Comes Home

    HR 1955 The U.S. House of Representatives recently passed HR 1955 titled the Violent Radicalization and Homegrown Terrorism Prevention Act of 2007. This bill is one of the most blatant attacks against the Constitution yet and actually defines thought crimes as homegrown terrorism. The Bill passed 404-6. This Bill criminalizes any act of, or promotion […]

  • How Not to Pick Up Asian-American Women

    Via Angry Asian Man: 1) Where are you really from? “I really am from Texas, and I don’t care where your Asian ex-girlfriend was really from, either.” 2) Do you … speak any other languages? “Nice try. Unless we’re having a deep conversation about linguistics while the maitre d’ decants our Malbec, stop asking me […]

  • Bacon Call

    Ron: I’m making salmon and tilpia. Andy: Yes? Ron: Yes. I’m making feast. Andy: You’re making a feast. Ron: No. I’m making feast. … Andy: Why aren’t you going with me to Vegas? Ron: I have to work. I can’t always be at your bacon call.

  • 190#

    Dear Christ. I weigh 190#. I guess I can rationalize that I’ve been at this new job for 2 months, plus I really think my Zoloft contributes for the past several years. Even when I was going to the gym nearly every day and lifting and doing cardio June-August I didn’t seem to drop weight. […]

  • Millions Watch as Woman Sexually Assaulted on 'Big Brother'

    A woman passed out drunk on the popular reality TV show ‘Big Brother’. One of the other housemates, then proceed to stick his fingers in her vagina. And the cameras kept rolling. Bezuidenhout lay down next to the comatose young woman and penetrated her vagina with his fingers. He carried on despite the pleas of […]