Building a (Banana Nut) Mystery

There’s something about Sarah McLachlan’s music that is like a big warm fuzzy.
Like warm banana-nut pancakes on a cold dewy morning. Like mom and dad leaving
the house open at night so the cool wet air comes through the screen doors and
leaves you in your pyjamas and socks for a few extra hours until the day warms
up. Pumpkin, our cat, would push his dry-wet nose against your cheek to wake you
up. Or park on your chest and purr until you roused. Mom calls to you for the
third time, ‘breakfast, kids!’ And I’d read the funnies and try to understand
what was so frigging funny about Nancy.

I used to say that I was ‘building a mystery’ when I was in a Sarah McLachlan
listening binge. And mostly just to the same 5 or 6 songs. I think it’s her
vowels… the ‘ill’ phonemes in Building a Mystery coupled with the warm oak
resonance of her voice plus the backup singers (this is on Mirrorball)
really make me feel like I’ve been dipped in warm butter and wrapped in a fluffy
down comforter. Maybe that’s either/or instead of and. There’s something very
minstrel-like in her music (minstrel in a good way). It’s like she’s been traveling
the world and has brought these songs to me. Same thing with ‘Sweet Surrender’
– which I think was inspired by a letter from one of her stalkers. The romantic
tune with the carnivorous ‘I’m gonna keep you in a well in my basement and eat
you with a spork’ really is a great conflict. And of course the club tune Silence
is a great combo of trance and good sangin’.

I’m a writin’ fool this morning. I climbed into bed at 10. Okay 11. Anyway
– I started going to bed at 10 and ended up actually in bed at 11. I started
watching the miniseries Taken on DVD – it’s alright so far… I think I’m gonna
like it since it takes you through multiple generations of three families who
were central in the aftermath of the Roswell crash. I love epic far-reaching
stories like that. Like The
Kentucky Cycle
– the 9-act play about the conquering of Appalachia by Europeans
and consequent rape of natural resources.

I still one day want to write my own version of Oedipus
and – shit – what’s the middle play of the cycle? Oedipus at Colonus? Yeah –
that’s the one where the brothers are at war and Oedipus drags his daughters
around and feels sorry for himself. I’d love to make the Oedipus Rex version
more of a chamber piece. My Antigone is so ‘cast of thousands’ that I think
it’d be fun if Oedipus Rex took place all in one room – an imperial chamber
– claustrophobic and where the story of the people is told on a TV inside the
room. That Oedipus and Jocasta have barricaded themselves inside this room until
they can decide what to do. Maybe it’s their bedroom which would make the discoveries
of the play that much more revolting. Instead of Jocasta hanging herself I think
I’d rip off the Roman version of the play by Seneca
and have her disembowel her womb – the source of all of the pain. Or maybe she
sets the bed on fire. That’d be badass. Maybe she cuts out her uterus, douses
herself with gasoline and then sets herself on fire.

Now that’s just being ridiculous. (Jesus would Brigitte love to play that role!)

Ron and I also started watching season one of Oz.
I’ve always admired Tom Fontana – he was one of the masters behind Homicide:
Life on the Street
. Have I ever waxed on that show – the
one episode with Charles S. Dutton
playing an imprisoned father and his
daughter is coming to terms with his absence and trying desperately to forgive
him… totally tears your heart out. And Andre Baugher is a master. I think
he should be on ’24’. He’d be fantastic on that show – sort of the taut tense
foil to Dennis Haybert’s David Palmer.

Work has been busy the past two days with getting up to speed on the new position
and trying to offload and unload what I was doing before. Had my first meetings
with the developers and learned that for the most part you can get out of their
way and just keep the conversation rolling and they run the meeting themselves.
I forget that these guys love programming and the opportunity to talk shop and
‘how did you do that?’ is a great time for them. Though they are a bunch of

The ladybugs have hatched and are everywhere. It don’t know how they get inside
the house but they do. Our old place on Ashland must have had a nest or something
because the front room would have at least half a dozen alive ones and couple
dead ones for the space of a few weeks every fall.

Brig said the wedding shower went well. Her sister is getting married into
the Mormon church. I can’t imagine anything worse than a dry wedding shower.
Though Brigitte informed me that when the time comes, she will be having a couple’s
shower with margaritas and lots of strippers. I figure Ron and I can have our
shower at the gym. Instead of playing stupid games we can have everybody do

I really don’t get the new McDonald’s
‘I’m Lovin’ It!’ campaign
. I’m loving what? Eating like a big fat fuck and
ingesting bovine growth hormones? If they were supersmart they’d partner with
the Adkins Diet freaks and have four or five offerings on their menu that are
Adkins approved.

Another reason I love my company: I’m on the phone with the big boss and we’re
talking about promotions and logistics and strategy and he says, “Hold
on a second… (pause) Is that a ghost I see!!!” “YES! Boo!”
“Wow! You’re so scary Abigail!” (she laughs) “Okay, you go drink
your milk okay?” “OKAY DADDY!” “Bye honey.” “BYE!”
And then we’re back to business.

I have been watching way too much Seinfeld. I quote it way too much in my brain.
You’re not giving away
the waterpick!
Now if
you’ll excuse me, I have to go fill my freezer with my own blood.
F Kennedy, June-yuh!
We’re trying to have a civilization here!
I have just a little grace?
for ruining my daddy’s business you fat fuck!
Guess again tubby. Jimmy likes
Elaine a lot – Jimmy wants to go on a date with Elaine! Serenity Now! I’ll go
wash off the facepaint, I’ll come back, we’ll make out. Get in there and take
your clothes off – we’re gonna cuddle! Eatin’ olives. (Ever hear of asking?)
Jerrrr-reeee don’tchoo wanna see the bay-ee-bee! Let’s take up a notch.

Low-talkers, high-talkers, slow-walkers… I think it’s my deep fantasy of
being a totally selfish, totally self-involved un-redeeming asshole that appeals
to me. I think that’s why I loved the movie Ruthless
so much – because of the tight, recursive plotting of selfish, scheming







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