Monthly Archives: February 2007

Book Banned Over Use of the Word ‘Scrotum’

Just when you thought it couldn’t get any stupider:

…”The Higher Power of Lucky,” by Susan Patron, this year’s winner of the Newbery Medal, the most prestigious award in children’s literature. The book’s heroine, a scrappy 10-year-old orphan named Lucky Trimble, hears the word through a hole in a wall when another character says he saw a rattlesnake bite his dog, Roy, on the scrotum. “Scrotum sounded to Lucky like something green that comes up when you have the flu and cough too much,” the book continues. “It sounded medical and secret, but also important.” The book has already been banned in some places.

I’d be more concerned that Lucky Trimble the orphan is not only eavesdropping but listening through a gloryhole.

We are Americans. And we are deathly afraid of our own bodies.

Tim Hardaway Doesn’t Like Gay People


You know, I hate gay people, so I let it be known. I don’t like gay people and I don’t like to be around gay people. I’m homophobic. I don’t like it. It shouldn’t be in the world or in the United States.

And if there was an out player on his team:

If you have 12 other ballplayers in your locker room that’s upset and can’t concentrate and always worried about him in the locker room or on the court or whatever, it’s going to be hard for your teammates to win and accept him as a teammate.

Why do homophobes always feel they are so damned irresistible to any same-gender-lover?

He ain’t no looker.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:

If straight masculinity is so durable and strong and dominant in our society – why does two men holding hands immediately destroy that?

The truth is gender roles are more delicate than most like to believe. The group agreement of Men Kill Things, Women Birth Things isn’t as valuable or permanent as people like to think.

The Big Mo

Did anyone else just see CNN on Rudy Giuliani calling this


As in ‘the big moment’.

Not to be confused with


As in ‘the big frickin’ homo.’

Midnight Tribute

(phone rings, it’s Ron)

Andy: Why are you still up?

Ron: I know. I have to work tomorrow at 3am.

Andy: Honey you have to sleep. It is 11:30!

Ron: I know. (pause) Can I ask you a question?

Andy: Of course, honey.

Ron: I need your opinion on something.

Andy: Sure, honey. What?


Online Privacy Nightmare

  1. I have a Tivo.
  2. Tivo monitors my TV watching habits, what I rewind and what I skip.
  3. I pay for my Tivo with a credit card.
  4. The credit card company can collate all of my purchasing habits showing what I buy, what else I buy it with, where I buy it and when.
  5. My credit report details all of my credit cards, adding for more information on my purchasing habits: books, movies, DVD rentals, food, medication, dental and doctor visits.
  6. A review of my purchasing habits would show the ISP I use for browsing the internet.
  7. My ISP traffic can be routed and monitored to determine my Google search habits, any unsecured email I send and monitor keystrokes.
  8. My gym has a card that I swipe to enter through turnstiles, logging when I enter.
  9. My purchasing habits also reveal my cellphone provider that can be monitored as it connects to cellphone towers showing my location.
  10. All incoming and outgoing calls on my cellphone and landline can be monitored and datamined.
  11. My TV watching, local errands, purchases, utilities, voting habits, online profiles, electricity usage, internet searches and usage, cellphone calls, landline calls can all be rolled up into one easily aggregated data profile.
  12. Anyone I call or email can also have this same information generated about them. All you need is one thread and the rest can be populate easily.
  13. And it isn’t considered wiretapping because it is ‘just datamining’ looking for patterns and connections and letting computers datacrunch us all into networks across multiple conduits.

Kellog Madness

I have eaten an entire box of Special K with Strawberries in the last 12 hours.

That is all.

Further bulletins as events warrant.