thursday, june 28

I am so sore. Jesus. My back hurts like no weights workout could do. Had dinner with Tommaso last night after acupuncture. Had a nice anxiety attack in the middle of our walk to dinner. I tried to stay low-key and I think I made it through alright but Erik noticed as he walked by with his dog. Why are you sweating so much? Luckily, Tommaso was talking to some friends and didn’t hear. I quietly related to Erik I’m having an anxiety attack. And it was soon over in about five minutes. I started Zoloft again two days ago. I’m gonna do a half-dose like I was doing last year at this time. Enough to help me ease back from the abyss but not enough that I’m not pissed off enough to write. I just feel un-stable lately. Too many projects. As always. As usual. I need a vacation. Though I know that I really get no break until mid-August after Sinister opens. I feel a-wash.

I keep thinking of my propensity to always try and do too much. I feel like I need to just drop everything for a month and then re-group and re-prioritize all of my little personal projects I’ve got going. Really want to get the theatre site back up and running – I’ve got some cool ideas for it.

My back will not move today. I feel like I have a board inserted back there.

Had lunch with Erik at Big Bowl. We always go there and always say we’re going to go somewhere different but then we don’t. But it’s so good. Erik commented on my pale complexion as of late. Of course he’s Mexican-Guatemalan so he’s brown year roun’. Maybe I’ll hit the fake bake tonight.


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