tuesday, september 11

I keep waking up and each time I do things are even worse. Tom Clancy was on talking about the need for stepped-up intelligence and it’s negligence in that it’s not a high-profile activity for the defense of this country. Clancy also tamed the rabid reporter that the religion of Islam condemns suicide just as much as Christianity – that these are not your average Muslims – and that Catholic and Protestants in Northern Ireland can act just as savage – that was some good grounding to the paranoia spinning out of control on the airwaves. I keep thinking about if these were indeed extremists from the mid-east how someone wouldn’t have profiled them on their way in – wouldn’t you notice a couple or trio of mid-eastern-looking terrorist types (and I do say ‘looking’ because that’s such a big part of the paranoia)? Part of me wonders if this was perpetrated by Americans. That would be an even worse nightmare – that the enemy is (still) within. What a fucking waste.

Another heartbreaking scenario, a woman was IM-ing her husband and he was in the second tower and was saying he was fine – his responses abruptly ended and she looked out the window and the building was gone. Another: a woman locked herself in the bathroom of the plane that crashed in Pennsylvania and called emergency dispatchers screaming we’ve been hijacked we’ve been hijacked. The dispatcher stayed on with her until a terrible sound overtook the phone and the line went dead. The stories of people wandering through New York covered in ash remind me of the book Hiroshima where the walking dead are shell-shocked and everyone pilgrimages to the river to soothe their burned skin.

Called Lingo and she’s contacted Josh, Sara and Aaron in NYC and they’re all alright. I called Andy’s dad to see if he and Katy had reported in – they were safe as well. Jen and Kevin emailed that they were safe too.