The wedding shower for Alan

The wedding shower for Alan and Jessi went well. The girls had been out doing the bachelorette party all Saturday night and evidently everyone showed their Ohio white trash drunken whore roots. Except for Brigitte – she got their late because she’s in a production of Nine – for once Karen was the one that should have been wearing an air-brushed T-shirt and Brig was the designated mom (Karen threw up on the floor of a bar – Liv promptly slipped in it). Lingo nearly drowned in the toilet at Karen’s house. Jen yacked on Brigitte’s car. They swear it was the champagne. The bottle of it they drank in the limo between each bar. All three bottles of champagne. The best part is Jessi, the bride-to-be, wasn’t all that decimated. But Lingo, the maid-of-honor, was back at home the next morning with Jason (hubbie) trying to get her to drink Pedialyte. Jen and Liv picked me up and we sped to Alan and Jessi’s house to set-up and cook – we were running late – Lingo and Jas were driving in a bit later. We got there and tore into the kitchen to get done before people started coming – no one came. Their friend Kurt and his girlfriend stopped by but other than that it was just the seven of us, Liv, Jen, Lingo, Jason, Alan, Jessi and me. But we had a good time. Lots of good sweets and kabobs courtesy of Sam’s Club. I felt so adult there. Jessi and Alan have a big-ass four-bedroom house – lots of room for kiddies, I presume (‘But not for ten years or so,’ adds Jessi). And just like my parents do – all the men went to the porch to eat and drink Guinness beer and all the women went into the living room. It is funny to me that we reflexively do that. We all hang out for an hour and then we eat and then separate for a half hour or so and then we’re back together. It’s just funny that Alan, Jason and I are the Men hanging out on the porch talking shit about shit. And funnier that Liv, Jen, Lingo and Jessi are the Women. My God, we’re kids! So funny… Alan began to froth when he opened my present – a tacking hammer, a trowel and a five piece set of mini-pliers. I’d used lurid shots of women ripped from Interview magazine for the tissue paper. We were very tempted to tack them up but their house is all paneling and tile right now. Jessi said if shit starts appearing on the walls she has me to blame. “Honey, where’s the mail?” “Right up there.” Hee hee. Liv crashed on the couch while we Jiffy-Popped and ate the brownies the girls were to fucked up to enjoy the night before. Lingo’d made chocolate brownies and then frosted them with peanut butter and then a layer of chocolate pudding. Yumba.

Napped on the way home and then got home and called Ron who was down in the hood. Took the bus down and the Gaysian Mafia was out in full-force and Ron was showing me(happy to be a trophy). We had dinner at Buddies and then I dropped him off at Roscoe’s to dance with his friends. Came home and went to bed around midnight.

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About Andy

Gay Hoosier Taurus INFJ ex-playwright pianist gymbunny published author in San Francisco. Tw · Fb