The Mostly Unfabulous Social Life of Ethan Green

Mostly harmless. Based on a comic. Not as sexy as it could have been, not as funny as it think it is.

Surely they could have found a make-up artist willing to work for almost nothing or intern for this movie. Instead we are treated to digital video shots of actors pimples, stretchmarks and other assorted dermatologic sights. I’m not knocking anybody for a pimple – I just think it’s a bit crazy to spend so much time on a film and not have someone say: You might wanna cover up that pulsating whitehead before it takes over the screen like Gojira.

The movie is kinda funny, kinda not. The usual tropes in full effect: chaotic white gay boy can’t decide anything because he’s too shallow, too materialistic, too possessive, too scared… you know the routine. Crazy ass drag queen provides wisdom (two of them in this movie). Black lesbian provides solace. Nobody has a job yet everyone has a money and an apartment and time for lots of sex. A bonuswas the appearance of our dear Meredith Baxter (no more Birney for you!).

And the manicure. There is a 5-second shot where an actor is checking a schedule at a community center and he draws his index finger down the marquee and the camera follows. Anybody else notice that gnawed-off stump of a fingernail? At least get a finger-double for that kind of work if you can’t afford to have just one single finger manicured (or maybe the director just thought of that shot and the actor was thinking ruh-roh).

Now give me a movie about Kyle’s Bed and Breakfast and I’ll show up just to see who plays Eduardo Alvarez.

We still want a movie or series about Adam and Andy.


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4 responses to “The Mostly Unfabulous Social Life of Ethan Green”

  1. Richie Avatar

    I was the first queen to gasp in horror when that gnarled finger appeared on the screen.

  2. Andy Avatar
    Andy

    THANK GOD. I’m not crazy.

  3. JB Avatar

    And Adam & Andy series would be so cool…

  4. JB Avatar

    Dammit. Why do I keep typing “and” instead of “an”???

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