28. STEVEN SPIELBERG: Onslaught of films that are full of “wonder” and “splendor” and small innocent boys with bowl haircuts in confusing/terrifying situations. Thirty-year creative progression was from mechanical fish to mechanical lizards. You will want to kill many innocent people after seeing Always.
16. ARI FLEISCHER: Wherever he ends up placed on this list will not be high enough. This motherfucker carries G.W. Bush’s demon seed in his anal womb, gestates a fresh offspring a couple times a day and produces a few Rosemary’s steamers at press conferences with all the non-chalance of a Spot Coffee latte jerk.
12. EMINEM: Expecting people to care about his shitty childhood because he is white. Lifting weights after he got famous. Has already worn out his shock value to the extent that his next album will have to include slurs against parapalegics and land-mine victims just to raise eyebrows. For someone who sells millions of records partly due to making fun of other people, has no sense of humor about himself. Trailer-trash cracker with just a hint of Down’s Syndrome.
7. CARDINAL ROGER MAHONY: Represents everything that is corrupt and wrong in the Catholic Church. As archbishop of Los Angeles, Mahony personally lobbied for and oversaw the construction of the $189.5-million-dollar Cathedral of Our Lady of Angels, despite protests against a “fat cat cathedral” and evidence that the site chosen was a sacred Indian burial ground. The cathedral also boasts two conference centers, separated by a cafe and gift shop, with catering,, projection screens, and high-speed DSL access. Exactly 16 days after the dedication of the cathedral, Cardinal Mahony announced that the Archdiocese of Los Angeles, the nation’s largest, would have to lay off 60 workers and cut eight programs due to a $4.3 million dollar deficit. Close your eyes and picture someone that acts like a CEO and protects people who molest children. Can you picture him yet? Now put a little red hat on him and a bunch of fancy robes. There you go!
5. MARY KATE AND ASHLEY OLSEN: isdeeds: Their entire life up to this point. They also have their own fashion and lifestlye line available at Walmart which teach young girls that it’s OK to be walking through piles of shit as long as you have a cute skirt and flirty earrings. One half Britney Spears, one half Andres Serrano’s Piss Christ
1. ANN COULTER: Goebbels with tits. The phenomenon we all should Whore Cunthave seen coming; the merger of bimbo sex appeal and neo-fascist vituperation.
The Buffalo Beast publises their list of The 50 Most Loathsome People in America for 2002. Highlights: