More Catholic Church-Hating

Sam: We are going to Hell, and I don’t care.
Friend: I wouldn’t have it any other way.
Friend: since GWB and the Jesus Crispies will be living it up in heaven of course.
Sam: HAHA… Jesus Crispies? I’ve never heard that one before.
Friend: I don’t know how we came up with that, but my group of friends called religious people that in college.
Sam: I’ll have to save that one for later. I’d totally buy Jesus Crispies cereal [especially if it came with marshmallow crucifixes and holy grails].
Sam: You know, they won’t make a gluten-free wafer for Catholics who are allergic to the wheat in them. The Pope says they have to eat the regular wafer or they go to Hell.
Friend: Well, Jesus himself wasn’t gluten free, so why should tasty replicas of his corpse be either?
Friend: The Church has to draw the line somewhere.
Sam: He did break a lot of bread, but there’s no proof that he ate it.