Gay Dog Whistle

When we are out we try to see if we can sense homos among us. There were two tables near us composed of all men and they all seemed a bit too groomed to be straight. This was all confirmed when we heard the gay dog whistle: Madonna. ‘Frozen’ came on over the sound system and Ron was able to spot a few of them mouthing the lyrics to which most people would agree is one of her best songs from Ray of Light. This was further confirmed when Alanis’s ‘Ironic’ came on and several of them were also singing along. I think the song that would have made it a trifecta is if ‘Bad Romance’ came on – that opening tribal chant is just way too effective. I do wish that the Muppets would have a video of Beaker doing that ‘Rah-rah-ah-ah-ah-ah!’ battlecry. ‘Mee mee mee-mee-mee-eee!’ If you have never seen Beaker to Carmen’s Habanera or Ode to Joy they might be the funniest things I’ve ever seen in my life.


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