Flux

As I wrote last week there seems to be a confluence of stressors lately. It’s strange. It goes beyond ‘when it rains, it pours’. This is like a crucible. It’s like there’s a lot of small and large pressures coming from all sides that the only way to survive is to purify. I know that sounds strange.

I was reflecting last night on ‘being too nice’ and how I have such emotional reactions to things (usually carefully hidden from others). And how I sometimes feel like my emotional reaction is a bad thing – but then I started seeing how an event like the one Sunday night would have shut me down mentally for a couple days before.

I think as I’ve grown I move through that emotional reaction faster – more quickly to decisive action. I don’t think I’ll ever get rid of that tendency to take things so personally – and I think it’s one of my natural gifts – but to feel fully and move to action is a much more powerful stance to be in.

Once I decided I was moving out, I felt a lot better. Yes, it’s going to be aggravating to move again – but at least I hadn’t notified everybody of my new address. I still haven’t unpacked some stuff. And I already know how many boxes I need to get. It’s like I’ve already rehearsal-moved so now I know exactly what I need this time around. I may get rid of even more stuff this time – who knows.

Maybe God is telling me to travel light!

I think when I went through a similar level of crap a few years ago I remember thinking.

Sometimes God leaves a Post-It note. If you ignore those, he sends you the memo.

I got the memo. If you ignore the memo – you get a pink-slip – and then you know you’re in deep shit.

7 thoughts on “Flux

  1. sam

    Yeah. I ignored the post-it note once. The post-it note being the fact that as I pulled up with a truck full of shit to move into my place and get my key, the manager “regretfully informed” me that the previous tenants hadn’t moved out yet and an eviction would take 30 days.

    Memo – apt. manager would do nothing to fix everything that was wrong with the place, including a horrible leak behind a wall.

    Pink slip – sheetrock near the leak disintegrated and fell on my roomie’s head.

    I suppose that was the point “God” wanted me to get – never put up with patronizing bullshit from people with authority.

    And now I don’t! And now I can call my ex-roomie Omarosa, which is an added bonus.

  2. Andy

    Just got back from the power blowing out in the apartment. Called the maintenance guy after switching the circuit breakers back on in the closet didn’t work.

    He called back and said I had to go to the other circuit breakers. You know, the ones that actually do something. I guess the ones accesible in my apartment were just decoys.

    So I went to the back of the buildings and got into the electrical and bike room. Stared fitfully at the circuit breakers of my kindly neighbors and evilly wondered What if…? But realized there’s enough bad kharma as it is.

    The electricity probably blew out since I only have 1 grounded set of outlets in the unit. So I’ve 2 powerbars worth of hardware hooked up to it.

    Just call me Job!

  3. dad

    ONE OF THE MOST EXCITING THINGS TO DO WHEN I VISIT PEOPLE IS TO CHECK OUT OTHERS LIBRARY OUT.WHEN WE MOVED YOU KIND ENOUGHT TO LOAN ME A COPY OF SARK’S BOOK “TRANSFORMATION”.I ENJOY THE READING AND FOUND A LETTER WE ALL SHOULD HAVE RECIEVED.
    “GOOD MORNING .THIS IS GOD I WILL BE HANDLING ALL YOUR PROBLEMS TODAY .I WILL NOT NEED YOUR HELP .SO HAVE A GOOD TIME.ILOVE YOU!!” WE ALL SHOULD GET THIS MESSAGE SEVERAL TIMES A WEEK………DAD

  4. RcktMan Rick

    Good God Andy… You need to post the address of that apartment building to the world so that NOBODY in their right MIND moves in there. What a nightmare this has been for you.

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