Before we got married we were on tour, and we were just like kids, ordering room service, saying, ‘Let’s go out tonight.’ Then, all of a sudden, you have this home, you have the kids [Federline’s two children from a previous relationship], you have to get the diapers, get the dog to the vet. It’s this reality. Like omigod, I have to tell the maid to buy diapers and get the pool boy to walk the dog? Can’t I just make out with Kevin all the time? Being married sucks.
Listen, you trailer trash pop tart: most moms don’t have a frigging maid and a pool boy.