Monthly Archives: January 2001

I’ve changed my blog’s name

I’ve changed my blog’s name again – in the past few days it has been ‘does the word choad make ya laugh? how bout moist’ – before that it was ‘moist and ready – not about brownies’ and before that ‘sometimes my arms bend back’. Today it’s called (773) EAT-SHIT.

LA Weekly reports on the

LA Weekly reports on the “the magical, mystical Negro best friend?:

Hollywood is smart enough to know that the nigger can no longer be synonymous with unmitigated evil, so it?s flipped the script and made black folk ? men and women ? spiritual mammies to white folk. Since white folk?s anxiety has to be quelled, familiar representations of blackness are being dusted off and given a retooled soundtrack, and it?s all good, yo. In truth, it?s containment passed off as celebration. These days, to shop and fuck across a Benetton rainbow of options is what passes for relevant, even progressive American cinema.

My best friend Kate turned

My best friend Kate turned 26 today. She and I first met in high school health class where we’d count the number of times the teacher would say the word ‘goofy.’ (“fallopian tubes are kinda goofy y’all… duodenum is a goofy word…”) We first bonded as Twin Peaks freaks. I think I’ll always have a crush on her but after repeated invitations to love, I remain a friend – though I like to tell her she drove me to date men. She’s dating a cool guy right now that I teased her was cruising me at a recent wedding. I hope he gives her some oral sex real soon. I think I just heard Kate’s jaw drop open. I called her this morning and her breakfast consisted of pizza, cake, a coke and some green tea. Right, Kate. Detox your byoosed ass! I think she was the first friend to being a long tradition of terrorizing eachother through email and telephone – sending hate mail and just merciless ribbing. We’re all excited because the popular kids all have crows feet. We both want to start Retin-A. She is also the only person I know that demands white cake at all times. She’s also obsessed with Alice in Wonderland. She’s always falling into ho’s. Oh I mean holes. Happy Birthday my bonny-Kate. I love you.

Setting up a blog for my actors to use as a journal during our process. I’ve spent this morning preparing all sorts of literature for them to read and think about. I’m gonna bomb them with paper on Friday. They better get ready!

Had a smoked turkey sandwich for lunch today – the best part was it had fresh basil leaves on it. I think that that makes my whole day. A little zing. A little zang.

Going to the gym tonight. Then I have to come home and clean the house for our kick-off party on Friday night. Meeting with what might turn into a big big web design account on Saturday afternoon.

I was realizing this morning the number of projects I’ve got spinning around right now. A website for an actress, one for a non-profit, a nightclub I’m creative consulting for, my adult website stuff, my plays in March, my play in July, a weblog – not to mention a day job, a social life and a fitness regimen. Mom and dad suggested I schedule a week-long retreat after Antigone closes. I want to go to Prague. That would so fucking rock! Or New Mexico – some where out in the desert – nobody to bother me or get in my face. Just a week away – disconnected and turned off. That would rock.

Brigitte and I got manicures last night. That was fun. I’d never had one before. Sorta relaxing. Though I did get excited about the pedicure chairs – they have tubs at the foot to soak your feet in. Mierka told me to find a place with Korean chicks. The best part was the big Buddha on a shelf next to a week-old coffee cup.

tuesday, january 30

Schisse! The blogger site went down and everybody thought they’d lost their blogs. It’s back up now. And I think I have everything working in Netscape now. Fucking cross-browser bullshit drives me out of my mind. Some chat excerpts from tonight:

brit guy: I was talking to the US last week (Boston, IBM) they were thick too!
me: yes – esp in Bahtahn…
brit guy: Yes, you must know fuck in the USA?
me: but fucked off doesn’t mean angry in our slang
brit guy: Oh, OK. Knackered is the same, or shagged in the UK
me: I like knackered.
me: Always liked the term snogging too
brit guy: Is that UK only then? What about bonked?
me: as in we bonked all night?
brit guy: Yep
brit guy: What about wank?
me: masturbate?
me: wanker is like calling somebody a cock
brit guy: Yes but I thought that was UK only, like knob end
me: well people here don’t use the word wanker but
we sorta know what it means
brit guy: and bollocks
me: I love the expression ‘bollocks to you’
brit guy: or just “bollocks”, I even use that with the
me: that means balls right?
brit guy: Yep balls.
brit guy: Be right back, have to dangle the wangle!
brit guy: back, sorry needed to go
me: sure thing – understood
brit guy: Fair answer
me: dangle the wangle… let’s see – we say piss,
use the can, pee, not too many exciting words
for pissing – shake the dew off the lillypad
brit guy: And my favorite toilet expression is “going
for a happy”
me: going for a happy
me: I am so using that tomorrow
brit guy: as in happy-crappy = crap
me: hee hee

brit guy: Worst are squirt and dump
me: ick
me: pinch a loaf

guy: (10:04 PM) my god you have a huge web page I am still reading LOL you must love to type ?
me: (10:04 PM) there’s a lot more to it
me: (10:04 PM) piano training’ll do it
guy: (10:06 PM) I am up to :
I just wasn’t in the mood to be in a mass of sweaty shirtless guys
Like is there ever a time ? lol
me: (10:06 PM) sometimes
me: (10:07 PM) when you’re slightly drunk
guy: (10:08 PM) I lived or shall I say took up residence in Atlanta for a few years and I use to go to Backstreets. Oh I guess I got my recommended daily allowance of shirtless naked men . and most were straight on the weekends. Thank god for booze and loose morals lol . I do so love a straight man every now and again . with a good red wine LOL
me: (10:08 PM) hee hee
guy: (10:11 PM)
You know for someone who came to the gay lifestyle relatively late in life you sure are a fast study . (still reading with mouth open now in aw)
me: (10:12 PM) it’s pretty simple – at least the surface part is – worship youth and over-consume everything: drugs, music, clothes, sex – oh and lots of diva music
me: (10:12 PM) oh and lots of self-loathing
guy: (10:14 PM) you should never hate yourself, thats others jobs.
besides who else looks that good in a tee?
me: (10:14 PM) hee hee – oh and you have to start wearing lycra blend clothes too – see this is just cotton – you can’t see my nipples through it
guy: (10:17 PM) I know I was taking not of the fact your beginning to be perky lol
and no wonder your starting to get anxiety attacts. does your mind ever slow down . Its just overbooked.
My first one was at Kroger . The left side of my face went numb . I thought I was having a stroke. I could just see me dripping drule down my chin as I spoke? Way to much Betty Davis .
me: (10:18 PM) that’s funny
me: (10:18 PM) not funny – but you know what I mean
guy: (10:19 PM) that which does not kill us makes us stronger
me: (10:19 PM) of causes early heart disease

guy: (10:22 PM) would you rather live to be ninty or die young and leave a great body behind ?
I want to burn out every cell .
me: (10:23 PM) hmmm… I sometimes can’t sleep because I’m scared I’ll die before I can get all this art out of me
guy: (10:23 PM) wow you stream inside your head too.
me: (10:24 PM) oh yeah – I’m nuts
guy: (10:25 PM) I don’t think so . well no more than average. sorry I would guess you hate to be average anything
I am on page two of your info and I think my head is swelling If you don’t hear from me again soon please call 911
guy: (10:34 PM) ok I am going to stop reading and just looking into your eyes till I get my mind right again LOL
me: (10:35 PM) hee hee
guy: (10:35 PM) You should include a warning label on that
me: (10:35 PM) what – info over load
guy: (10:36 PM) did you ever wonder if someone said you were so cute they could eat you with a spoon is they would use a soup spoon or a tea spoon ?
why did I think of that ? you have warped me forever
guy: (10:36 PM) my only hope is to delete your homepage cookie
me: (10:37 PM) I would hope they’d use a tea spoon to savor my flavor
me: (10:37 PM) though I’d like to think that I’m no sippin’ tea
guy: (10:37 PM) your a sick bastard god I love you lol
me: (10:40 PM) I am a sick bastard. You are correct sir

j: I think I told you before that I was 19 before I realize I liked guys . I was seduced. no thats not a good word. I was taken into the light by my college roomate A____. we were together for almost five years.
and before him I had been with girls but as soon as I slept with Aaron I knew what sex was suppose to be like . I think I loved him so much I may never have any more left in me .
as I said that which does not kill us makes us stronger . so I got a dog

Passed an older Polish lady

Passed an older Polish lady I used to work with, Danuta. I realized how similar she looks to Franka Potente from Run Lola Run – or Franka in about 20 years. I love Franka! Nick has a gal in his apartment that looks like her too – she’s a cool slavic lesbian. Yumm. If you have never seen Lola you must. It is my favorite movie from 1999 (along with The Matrix of course). I have the DVD and at the end they have a music video with Franka without the red hair and tattoo and she is stunning – like Elle McPhereson – only better.

Had a dream last night

Had a dream last night that I was doing some sort of detox procedure – it was done at a hip diner in front of an audience. There was a large bag of thick liquid that I had to inhale into my lungs and hold in there and then vomit it back out – it was supposed to purify my lungs. I was so scared because I knew if I did it wrong that I would drown myself. There were all sorts of people gathered to watch me do this. The M.C. handed me the back of thick liquid (like a smoothie). I was so goddamn scared. I opened it up and put it to my mouth and felt the viscous stuff slide into my mouth to the back of my throat. My heart was racing as I over-rode the gag and choke reflex and let the liquid slide down my windpipe and into my lungs. I could feel my lungs fill up with the stuff and felt it move into my veins and my limbs. I held it in and breathed this paste. The audience is silent as I have to hold it in for it to work. My eyes start to water. But I know I can do this. I got it. I look at the audience and announce: ‘Next stop! Colonics!’ and then vomit the material out of my lungs and into a basin. Woke up a little shaken this morning. Not stirred.